Boston Shore

I had quite an interesting experience last night while T-ing home. I stepped onto the T and it was as if I had been transported into a filming of the Jersey Shore, Boston style.

**If you don't know what The Jersey Shore is you should look it up. It is the most vulgar display of dysfunctional (and tan) humanity I've ever seen. It's basically a bunch of guidos and guidettes drinking and having sex, with a ton of Gym, Tanning, and Laundry thrown in. . .otherwise known as GTL.

. . .Oh right, back to my story.

So, there I was on the T, and I see this group of 4 guys and a girl were splayed around the seats. I walked past them and sat down nearby in an available seat. I noticed that the guys were all wearing the same light wash jeans, white sneakers, tight graphic T's displaying their well sculpted biceps. And let's not forget the spiked Guido hair, which probably took longer to perfect than it took me to get ready that morning.

The token girl was wearing bedazzled Uggs, ripped to shreds jeans, and a tight low cut top. Her hair was fried into submission, straightened to within and inch of its life and she was an unnatural tan for this time of year.

The first thing to come out of her mouth after I got on the T was "God, I totally didn't get to go to the gym today!"
Thus, began a long discussion among them all about their almost daily gym habits, sprinkled with some sexual innuendos.
Following, was a lengthier discussion about tanning and who goes where, for how much. Snooki wannabe was loudly proclaiming that she got free tanning from her landlord at his tanning salon.

This prompted Ronnie wannabe to ask her what she wore tanning.

"Nothing," she replied, "I don't want tan lines. . ."

"Show Me!" Guido 2 cackled and they all started laughing. Snookie made a motion like she was going to unbutton her pants.

"Whoa, whoa" Guido 3 calls, "save that for when I take you home (or at least something along those lines)!" More laughter erupted, while I tried so hard to keep a straight face. Not because the joke was funny, but because they were so freaking ridiculous, I couldn't even take it!

Surprisingly, laundry was not discussed, so the trifecta wasn't quite completed but I think that's only because they got off the train. Darn.

The T is such an interesting place sometimes. Can I get a fist pump?