Surprise:Ruined

"I have this theory that Alex didn't actually die"

"Ummmm, I still haven't finished the book. Alex dies????"

This is the moment this morning where I put my foot in my mouth (first 223243421 time for everything. . .) while texting a friend about a sequel to a book I read, and she is still reading. apparently.

My response was to just say it like it was. "There's no way to recover from this. I'm sorry" (paraphrased)

Ruining surprises (endings, parties, engagements) is like asking someone when she's "due" only to find out she's not even pregnant(never EVER do this. I wait for the confirmation facebook post that the child has been birthed before mentioning pregnancy to the mother.) or telling someone there little daughter is so cute, only to find out it's their son.

There really is no way to make up for it.  I've found the best approach is the aforementioned acknowledgement of nonrecovery. That is, just say it. "This is teribble, I'm sorry, and I know nothing I saw will make this better."

Then-Stop talking. Don't try and explain away your faux paux. You can't take it back. They can't be unsurprised and you might further ruining things if you keep blabbing about it.

Blessedly (as far as I can remember) I've yet to ruin a surprise party which I think must be the worst.

"See you next Saturday at your party" (Your voice drops off on that last word as you realize what you've done)

"What party? Saturday's my birthd. . ." (Bing. lightbulb on. surprise ruined)

Even if you manage to throw them off the scent by insisting they really are going to see a highschool production of RENT with their grandmother, the seed was planted .  You've robbed them of that moment of pure, unadulterated surprise.

Thankfully the closest I've ever gotten to ruining a birthday surprises was at my grandmother's 80th when I referenced the next leg of the surprise to her. Thankfully, her hearing isn't what it once was and so she completely missed it (I think). Phew.

If you've ever had a book ending, surprise party, or other big surprise ruined for you by a Chatty McChatt like myself, take comfort in the fact that it was worse for us than it was for you. . .